My kitchen nightmare!

It's a four day "weekend". Well, for my kids anyway. An extended weekend or a school vacation may be a break for the kids, but not for a SAHM.  For us it's a double shift.  The lunch time that usually occurs at school is now at home, in my kitchen, and the mess is all mine.

I am not a fan of meal times. I have never been. I have never been a big eater and quite frankly don't "get" the whole love of food thing. Don't get me wrong, I can certainly appreciate fine cuisine, but normal day to day meals; not really my thing.

I have spent most of my life not caring much if I eat or not. I would grab a granola bar, a cookie, whatever, and be on my way.  I don't claim that it's healthy, it's just what I always did.

Now, I am a Mom. I have 6 kids. Six kids that insist on eating three meals a day, everyday! WHAT???!!!!
Of course I feed my kids, I HAVE to, but I don't have to like it.

I used to actually enjoy cooking! Inventing recipes, entertaining with food that I prepared. I didn't usually eat much of it, but I loved to make it. Then I had kids. It's hard to enjoy preparing a meal that, when placed on the table, elicits instant tears from my nine year old son because, he "doesn't like that."
Once I had kids, cooking became a required chore, not one of relaxation and creativity. It also became the focal point of my life. I am forced to think about dinner at 8am so that I can have something defrosted to cook that night.

Meals on a day that my kids are home from school typically go like this....
My kids get up and head down for breakfast at about 9am. I am NOT a morning person and I can't stand the smell of food cooking in the morning so it's usually quick and easy breakfast foods. I make sure I always have bagels, yogurt, fruit, cereal and instant oatmeal on hand for my kids. Now that my older three are 14, 12 and 9, with this method, I am able to avoid breakfast altogether! The older ones help the younger ones and they clean up after themselves, mostly.

By the time the breakfast fiasco is over it's close to 10:30. At about 11:00, without fail, my 7 year old son, Nicholas will be asking me, "What's for lunch?" Really kid?! You just finished breakfast!

At 12:30 or so the lunch nagging has become annoying enough that I have to stop whatever I am doing (laundry, cleaning, scrubbing...) to now prepare lunch. Yay.

Lunch is worse than breakfast. It feels like I'm running a diner with really bad employees. One order of tomato soup, one hot dog with cheese, one peanut butter and jelly sandwich, one plain cheese quesadilla, one can of Chef Boyardee, one "I don't like anything".

The older two begin by fighting over who gets to use the microwave first. The baby takes one look at his PB and J and says, "I don't want this."
My daughter decides that she doesn't want her hot dog on a roll anymore because the cheese, "Makes the hot dog slide out." The quesadilla is, "too hot" and the soup is "too chunky." It's usually about this time that I have to put myself in time out.

When I compose myself, I excuse the children and tell them I'll clean up, mostly so that I don't have to listen to the complaints anymore.

Lunch is over and cleaned up and it's usually around 3:00. (Yes, it takes that long to feed six kids lunch.)

Finally finished in the kitchen, I resume my previous chore. Nicholas hunts me down to ask me a question;
"Mom?"
"Yes, Nick?"
"What's for dinner?"  The clock says 3:30.

"Hey, I'll friend you! What's your last name?"

You've heard it, I've heard it, hell, I've SAID it!

Facebook. Before you say anything, I'm not a basher, I'm on Facebook, I love Facebook, I'm a Facebook addict. I am also almost 40 years old.

I predate Facebook, I predate the internet, I predate computers. Okay, before some techy gets on my case about how computers and the internet have been around for longer than we think, blah, blah, blah…. I am talking about computers and internet for the general public, in people's homes, so relax.

When I was in school the "metric system was the way of the future" (hmmm, that conversion never took, huh?) When we went to the library, we looked up book titles and authors in the Card Catalog using the Dewey Decimal System (oh please, you 20-somethings, go Google it!) We made friends in school or in our neighborhoods.

As a person who has lived on both sides of technology, I am able to see and appreciate the irony. I actually enjoy it.

In Grade School, Middle School, High School, even college, I made friends, I lost touch with friends. Friends grew close, friends grew apart, life moved forward. It was the cycle.

Enter computers, enter the internet, enter; FACEBOOK. I joined, I friended family members that I rarely get to see. It was a lot of fun catching up and staying in touch.

Next, some of my friends (and by friend I mean the Friend as defined by Webster's Dictionary- one attached to another by affection, esteem or personal regard.) We would chat and share silly photos and just continue our friendship through an additional medium.

Later friend requests came from "old friends" people I used to know in H.S, College, Middle School and even some from Grade School. People I hadn't seen or talked to in forever, but were friends at some point in time, by the classic definition.

After a while, it got strange. Here come requests from ex-boyfriends and people from my distant past that I never really spoke to much or just flat out didn't care for. As a person who has lived life with the classic definition of "friend", I wasn't sure what was politically correct. Okay, I'll play, accept, accept, accept, accept. No big deal, right?

So, it seems to me that the while the original definition of "friend" remains the same, we may need a definition of "Facebook friend". Here's mine; Facebook friend- a person that you may or may not know, see, talk to, or enjoy the company of; another person on the social network, Facebook that has a pulse and appears on your "friends list". How's that?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a serial "friender"! I can tell you where each one of my "Facebook friends" came from. I may have met them at a party, through a mutual friend, whatever the case may be. I can't help it, I like people! So, I guess that Facebook is the perfect place for me to be!

 

 

 

 

 

Balance

I went to the movies with a friend of mine last night. It was a real girls night. We had a couple of beers and then went to see Eat, Pray, Love. It was a great night with girly bonding moments, Mommy survival stories, a little bit of the we're too old for the high school bullshit chat and the teeniest bit of men can be idiots talk.

We had both read the book, several times, and we both loved it. We were worried that the movie wouldn't do the book justice. We didn't have to worry, it held it's own. We were both impressed considering the ground they had to cover in 2 hours or less.

If you haven't read the book (you should!) it's basically about a woman who is restless and lost and is constantly looking for the person, place or thing that will balance her life, bring her happiness and give her internal peace. It's about me. Well, not literally, but it could have been.

It was hard for me to read the book the first time, because as much as I loved it, all I really took away from it was; "I'm divorced! I've been through more than her! She left her husband because she was bored (I had a more serious reason) and I didn't get to travel to Italy, India and Indonesia!"
I was the proud owner of a "I was married for 10 years and all I got was these 5 kids" tee shirt. In other words, I was bitter.

Now, years later, the message means more to me. I have witnessed pain in other peoples lives that would make your blood run cold, I have accepted the fact that I can't control what other people say and do and feel, and I can't travel the world with six kids.

I think for me, my balance, is beginning to come from the realization that I need to balance myself and not the world around me.

"If you could clear out all that space in your mind, you'd have a doorway. And you know what the universe would do? Rush in. Everything else will take care of itself." -Richard from Texas, Eat, Pray, Love

That quote from the book and the movie, makes more sense to me now than it did before. Before, it was a puzzle to me as to how to "clear out all that space". I have never been still, I have never been quiet, I have never NOT had 10,000 thoughts in my head all at once. I have never been able to "let it be". (again, Richard from Texas)
I am a fix it, solve it, make it go away person by nature. Control freak? Maybe to a degree, but with all the best intentions.

I am a work in progress, but I am learning. I am opening up to possibilities beyond my own dirty laundry pile. I am letting things take care of themselves.

I guess I am realizing that I have come a long way from where I once was. Life is crazy and hectic and unpredictable. Kids get sick, friends disappoint. Life is no different than it's ever been, it's me that's different.

I just might be getting the hang of this "growth" thing after all!

What was your name again???

It's that time of year that I look forward to the least, back to school night. I know, it's sounds horrible. I know I'm supposed to be "so excited" to be meeting my kids teachers. I know the teacher is the person that my child will spend the most hours with for the next 9 months or so, but quite frankly, I'm over it. How can I be "over it", you ask?

My youngest is 4, but he is special needs so he goes to Preschool Disabled in the public school.
He has 1 Special Ed. teacher, 1 Para-professional, 1 Speech/Language Pathologist and 1 Case Manager that I deal with daily.

My second grade twins are in the same class so they have 1 teacher. However, my daughter is also special needs so add in her Special Ed. teacher and her Case Manager. My twins are also in speech.

My fourth grader seems to be my most "normal" kid! He has 1 teacher, no special needs for learning, but does go to Speech.

As a sidenote, I will need to be in all three of the above classrooms simultaneously. Fortunately, my husband will be along for the ride tonight, so I'll put him in Pre-School and I'll run back and forth to the other two grades.

Here's where it gets fun! I have kids in higher grades!

My Seventh grader has 6 teachers and a Guidance Counselor. Lucky for me, he is an Honors student and your classic over-achiever, so I don't have to talk to his teachers much.

My High School Freshman keeps me on my toes! He has 7 teachers, which is to be expected in High School, but he also has ADD so as a result, 2 In Class Support teachers, a case manager and a guidance counselor. He can also be a bit unmotivated at times so I spend many hours in contact with all of his teachers and case manager.

It's a lot of people to keep track of and my brain at almost 40 is not what it was at 20-something!

So as I prepare to go to my first of three back to school nights, I will remember to keep in mind the importance of my children's education, the love that I have for my kids, and the fact that the teachers don't want to be there either!

Hope everyone's Back to School Nights go well! See ya around the halls!

We survived the first week of school!

Wow. It's finally Friday. I didn't think I would make it, but I did!
My kids went back to school on Tuesday. Big years for Michael and Alec. Michael started High School and Alec started Middle school. I was worried for both of them.

My little ones are still doing the grade school thing, and Aidan has one more year of preschool Special Ed. Thankfully, our home school opened up a preschool so at least he doesn't have to be on a bus for 40 minutes each way anymore. Yay!

So, now my day starts at 5:45 am. For many Moms, that's not a big deal, but I AM NOT a morning person, never have been. It doesn't help that in addition to not being a morning person, I am a NIGHT person and a person with insomnia. Not a good combo.

Michael gets up first, then Alec, then the youngest four. Mornings go pretty much as you would expect when there are six children involved. Someone is pokey, someone is cranky, someone is forgetful....kind of like if the 7 dwarfs suddenly woke up with attitude problems.

Everyone managed to get out the door each morning. Most of them got home each afternoon. Yes, I said most. I did get one phone call from my oldest who managed to miss not one, but two late buses. I never did get the whole story.

So it begins; soccer, gymnastics, Cub Scouts, Cross Country, Track and of course the dreaded Religion classes. All that tossed in with homework, tests, projects and science fair, it can be a bit overwhelming for all involved.

So, I try to remember to heed the advice that I give my kids. "One thing at a time." I encourage them to try to focus on one hurdle at a time, while remembering the hurdles ahead. It's the only way to stay sane in a world that is spinning way too fast.

So, we survived the first week!

I am so looking forward to the weekend!

Ahhh, the joys of Motherhood!

Today, August 31 is my second son, Alec's 12th Birthday. It's hot, and I mean, HOT outside and the two hurricanes (Danielle and Earl) that are brewing off of the East coast are stirring up some nasty rip tides. Rip tides mean no swimming at the beach so it's not a beach day for us! So, what's a Mom to do?

Being that we have an appointment this afternoon to have Alec do a walk through of his Middle School schedule for September, we have a time crunch problem. I decide, LUNCH, might be the perfect solution!

I consult Alec. He agrees, lunch sounds fun, so he picks Spicy Cantina. Spicy is on the boardwalk in Seaside Heights, they have outside, balcony seating so it sounds fun, right? We can look at the ocean, people watch, enjoy the cool ocean breeze while we enjoy a pleasant birthday lunch.

WAIT ONE MINUTE! I must have forgotten, I have six kids! Okay, I didn't forget that I have six kids, I just forgot what dining is like with six kids.

We arrive in Seaside, walk over to Spicy and sit. It is largely uneventful. Time to pick our meals, this is where is gets tricky.

You see, I have a 14 year old, who wants to eat like an adult, but doesn't like all the things that come with an adult meal. My 9 year old likes essentially, nothing, but eats like a horse. My 7 year old son likes everything, my 7 year old daughter knows what she likes and only orders what she likes, she's easy. Then there is my 4 year old, oh, he's fun. (Read sarcasm)

Here is a summary of lunch; kids drinks come out in kid cups, 14 yo, 9 yo are annoyed.

Michael (14yo) orders empanadas, too spicy.

Justin (9y0) orders adult tacos (because the kids meal is too small) but tacos must be only meat and cheese. No lettuce, no tomato. He hates the beans and rice.

Nicholas and Clarissa (7yo twins) are happy with their meals. Yay!

Aidan (4yo) Discovers "dots" on his mac and cheese. These "dots" can not be seen by anyone else but him so I assume that he has superhero vision, take his word for it, and order him a new meal.

The new meal comes and now he has a "stomachache".

We get through lunch and Alec wants to walk on the boardwalk. It is Alec's birthday after all, so we go, but not without a running dialog from Aidan;

"I want to go to the arcade!"

"I want to go on the rides!"

"My knee hurts, carry me!"

By now we're ALL over it and we head home. Aidan promptly falls asleep on the ride home, and the silence become Alec's best Birthday present ever!

Happy Birthday Alec!

Long time, no see!

Okay kids, it's been awhile, but I'm back! The consolidation fell through, thankfully, and our little school is better than ever! We just opened up a full day preschool! This is wonderful for us so now my little special ed sweetie doesn't have to be on a bus half the day!

I'm going to make a real attempt to get back into my writing. All six of my kids will be in school full time in 2 weeks and I am determined to do this, for ME.

I have also started to write articles for associated content. It's not what I usually write and not what I'm used to, but it's a good way to hone my skills and get me motivated. I will be sharing here as well.

I look forward to getting back into writing, see ya around the blog!

Now, if i could just get some more followers! :-)